{"id":27840,"date":"2026-11-03T10:15:38","date_gmt":"2026-11-03T15:15:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/co2mannatoday.com\/?p=27840"},"modified":"2026-11-03T10:42:40","modified_gmt":"2026-11-03T15:42:40","slug":"27840","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/co2mannatoday.com\/?p=27840","title":{"rendered":"Giving to Others"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed is-type-video is-provider-youtube wp-block-embed-youtube wp-embed-aspect-4-3 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"Less Like Scars\" width=\"500\" height=\"375\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/wtpZfYG1nBs?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Tuesday, November 3, 2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Life is a process of emptying and moving into the oneness of life and death. It is living through dying.&nbsp;<br>\u2014Sally Severino&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Dr. Sally Severino writes of the process of aging as an opportunity to more fully experience union with God. &nbsp;<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Human beings are meaning-making creatures. <strong>Our lives take on new meaning with ag<\/strong>e. As human longevity has increased, aging no longer means inevitable decline, deterioration, or disability. It is a time to become more authentically ourselves\u2014to be more freely who we really are in the fullness of our ripening.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Spiritually, my childhood entailed baptism and confirmation\u2014<strong>a time when I experienced God as parent. During mid-life my relationship with God became an understanding of God as partner. During senior life my relationship with God has taken the form of realizing the oneness of all life, including my journey toward oneness with God.<\/strong> This is consistent with what Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung described as the seven tasks of aging:&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ol>\n<li>accepting death as a part of life&nbsp;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>reflecting on one\u2019s life&nbsp;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>limiting one\u2019s time and energy&nbsp;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>letting go of ego dominance&nbsp;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>bringing opposites within us together into wholeness&nbsp;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>finding meaning in one\u2019s life&nbsp;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>engaging our unused potentials in \u201cdying with life\u201d&nbsp;<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p>In other words, <strong>we empty ourselves in imitation of Jesus. When we are totally empty and only God is within us, then we recover our true selves<\/strong>.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>When we realize God as our true being, we realize our true selves.<\/em>&nbsp;All we need to do is open our eyes to the goodness we have possessed all along. <strong>In seeing this goodness, we can die to \u201cour\u201d life and live the unique expression of God we were created to be. We can let God act in and through us. &nbsp;<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Severino describes how, by fully welcoming our oneness with God, we can offer our lives to the world: &nbsp;<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em><strong>We are not only the recipients of divine love; we are also the dispensers of love in the world.<\/strong><\/em>&nbsp;When we are one with Christ, our hearts and souls are full of a compassion that then flows out into the world through Christ\u2026.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em><strong>We are each given the mind of Christ and the ability to give this gift to other<\/strong>s.<\/em>All we need to do is become aware, be grateful, and share our uniqueness with the world around us. Christ encourages us to do as he did\u2014to act freely, expressing our gift in each unrepeatable moment of our lives. <strong>The spirituality of aging is a process of becoming increasingly Christlike\u2014of emptying ourselves until only God lives within us. Just as we are each a unique image of Christ in the world, so too is our ripening process unique. God is always knocking, wanting to enter our lives. All we need to do is open.&nbsp;<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>==============<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-table\"><table><tbody><tr><td><a href=\"https:\/\/substack.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.IIJHc3Fw02RfAlLitDrrlbZGLOMkrIns0fVXzUO4vxA?\"><\/a><\/td><\/tr><\/tbody><\/table><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>Welcome free subscriber. I\u2019m glad you\u2019re here.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Come, take a seat, and let\u2019s talk.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h1 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><a href=\"https:\/\/substack.com\/app-link\/post?publication_id=3367802&amp;post_id=223023772&amp;utm_source=post-email-title&amp;utm_campaign=email-post-title&amp;isFreemail=true&amp;r=2dkj2&amp;token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjozOTkyMzY2LCJwb3N0X2lkIjoyMjMwMjM3NzIsImlhdCI6MTc5MzU3NDQ5MiwiZXhwIjoxNzk2MTY2NDkyLCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMzM2NzgwMiIsInN1YiI6InBvc3QtcmVhY3Rpb24ifQ.3xhS_tit7CwFz3lcW99wA3vglbCgtS17iVucsaQRRPQ\">the neuroscience of deep character change<\/a><\/h1>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">(in a day of quick fixes)&nbsp;<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-table\"><table><tbody><tr><td><a href=\"https:\/\/substack.com\/@chuckdegroat\">CHUCK DEGROAT<\/a>    NOV 1<\/td><td><a href=\"https:\/\/substack.com\/@chuckdegroat\"><\/a><\/td><\/tr><\/tbody><\/table><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>It can be confusing to distill what real change looks like amidst the abundance of resources out there.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Should I add new spiritual practices?&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Should I focus on my emotional health?&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Should I try to change my everyday habits?&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>While all of these things are important, there is an underlying neuroscientific wisdom that holds much of it together\u2014the body\u2019s innate wisdom, which we can cooperate with for the sake of deep character change.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Here are five high-level principles that lay a foundation for deep change.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">1. Regulation precedes maturation<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Your nervous system profoundly influences how you perceive the world and respond relationally. And as I say in the new&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/substack.com\/redirect\/6a6a1c17-8241-4862-b433-22d28f79a39b?j=eyJ1IjoiMmRrajIifQ.ND0qR5RKsmVnltuWgIlyr3BY7uwq2Kt9ZzX29UJK4cg\">book<\/a>, it\u2019s almost impossible to change when your body is locked in threat mode.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Threat mode is a body in dysregulation, with little capacity to adapt or grow. It\u2019s a survival orientation, where your internal resources are bound up in self-protection rather than connection and growth.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>So, we need to create the conditions for growth by turning down your threat system and expanding your inner capacity for change. Otherwise, we may be inadvertently overwhelming your system with haphazard attempts at change.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The<strong> change process often begins here\u2014by working on creating the relational and internal safety that allows for a body to inhabit a new way of being in the world.&nbsp;<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">2. Character is patterned<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Neuroscience teaches us that <strong>what fires together, wires together<\/strong>. And<strong> repeated experiences strengthen neural pathways\u2026the very pathways that shape your habitual ways of thinking, feeling, reacting, and relating, and which become your character.&nbsp;<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I know it\u2019s common today to see books on character engaging ancient virtues\u2014and I appreciate that\u2014but these can become abstract.<strong> Character is anything but abstract. It\u2019s who you\u2019ve become over time. <\/strong>This is why insight or behavioral modification alone doesn\u2019t produce lasting change.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Your habits weren\u2019t born overnight\u2014and through the wisdom of neuroplasticity, you can slowly begin to reshape them. But this often requires more time and patience that we\u2019re willing to invest amidst many other microwavable interventions.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">3. Character is formed and re-formed in connection<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Your nervous system<strong> developed within your closest relationships, and continues to develop over a lifetime in the context of relationship<\/strong>. Those habits\u2014as I said, they didn\u2019t emerge overnight. They evolved based on the relative safety and connection you experienced. <strong>Who you are didn\u2019t happen yesterday\u2014you\u2019ve been \u2018becoming\u2019 for quite a long time!<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>So, character maturation isn\u2019t an individual achievement nor is it gained through mere self-help effort. <strong>To change, you\u2019ll need to experience safety, trust, vulnerability, and belonging\u2014and where there has been significant moral failure or betrayal, significant accountability.&nbsp;<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Creating the proper relational conditions is critical for real change.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">4. There is a story your brain is telling you<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Your brain is predictive. It actively interprets incoming data based on previous experiences.<strong> And in time, it forms a story.&nbsp;<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cKeep your guard up. You never know what\u2019s coming.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cIf you want something done right, do it yourself.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cNever let them see you sweat.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cDon\u2019t get your hopes up.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cIf I\u2019m not in control, everything will fall apart.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>These stories can feel like objective reality when they\u2019re simply ways you\u2019ve learned to inhabit your world\u2014for some really good reasons, I\u2019m sure. But these stories do not need to define your future.&nbsp;<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Your body can learn a new way of being in the world and a new and better story to live within.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">5. You become what you behold<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Character change depends, in large part, on what you attend to. <\/strong>When you\u2019ve lived for years in threat mode\u2014within whatever story that requires you to inhabit\u2014you attend to the world in a braced and vigilant way. Your attention narrows. You control what\u2019s in front of you. You tend to fight or flee. And it\u2019s almost impossible to hold space for beauty, goodness, and gratitude.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>People are often<strong> surprised when I invite them to pay attention to what they\u2019re paying attention to<\/strong>. But this simple act of intentional attention can begin to reshape reality. By doing this, you can make what has been invisible visible, bringing conscious attention to what has become habitual, engaging the prefrontal cortex, strengthening your capacity for self-awareness and emotional regulation, and increasing your sense of agency.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In time, you\u2019ll behold a whole new reality.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><a href=\"https:\/\/substack.com\/redirect\/116443f3-8fe3-4f94-bc91-213f2a456060?j=eyJ1IjoiMmRrajIifQ.ND0qR5RKsmVnltuWgIlyr3BY7uwq2Kt9ZzX29UJK4cg\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/substackcdn.com\/image\/fetch\/$s_!F_Eu!,w_430,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep\/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F74496eee-4ee7-45cf-aeee-87cafd8fdcaa_1302x1208.png\" alt=\"\"\/><\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-table\"><table><tbody><tr><td><\/td><td><\/td><td><\/td><\/tr><\/tbody><\/table><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>In sum, character change is not about an exhausting attempt to reach for what feels like some unattainable and abstract virtue. It\u2019s <strong>more about cultivating a capacity for deep change, through internal and relational safety and regulation, through intentional attention, through a growing awareness of your story and your state.&nbsp;<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Deep change is possible\u2014but it\u2019s a much more satisfying process when it\u2019s a process that cooperates with your nervous system rather than fighting against it, which is so often the case when we simply apply behavioral or spiritual interventions willy-nilly.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Character change, in the end, cooperates with your God-created, embodied wisdom<\/strong>. And it reveals that <strong>what you most deeply long for is possible, not least because God made this pathway of transformation possible in-and-through the unique way he designed you.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>=============<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Individual Reflection<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Which of your scars is still doing the work of a wall?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity\"\/>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Group Discussion \u2014 choose one<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<ol>\n<li>Which of your patterns are ripening with age, and which are just hardening?<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Where has your spiritual practice been one more quick fix laid over a body still braced for threat?<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>What have you been beholding lately, and what is it making you into?<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Tuesday, November 3, 2026 Life is a process of emptying and moving into the oneness of life and death. It is living through dying.&nbsp;\u2014Sally Severino&nbsp; Dr. Sally Severino writes of the process of aging as an opportunity to more fully experience union with God. &nbsp; Human beings are meaning-making creatures. Our lives take on new [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/co2mannatoday.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27840"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/co2mannatoday.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/co2mannatoday.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/co2mannatoday.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/co2mannatoday.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=27840"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/co2mannatoday.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27840\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":27849,"href":"https:\/\/co2mannatoday.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27840\/revisions\/27849"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/co2mannatoday.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=27840"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/co2mannatoday.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=27840"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/co2mannatoday.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=27840"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}