Systems of Honor and Shame Today
Thursday, March 19, 2026
Richard Rohr points out how honor-and-shame systems play out around and within us today:
One of the best ways to study Scripture is to use the lens of cultural anthropology; in other words, to learn about the social setting in which Jesus lived and the problems with which he was dealing. What we find is that the culture of his time was overwhelmingly dominated by an honor-and-shame system largely based on externals. In truth, we still live that way in the United States and Western Europe, although we pretend we don’t.
Honor and shame are what we would call ego possessions, personal commodities that we can lose or gain. We don’t have them naturally, so we have to work for our honor and then show it off and protect it. We have to deny our shame, which is now what we would call the shadow self. At Jesus’s time in history, and frankly with many today, there is no inherent sense of the self, no sense of natural dignity that comes from within.
Religion at its best and most mature is exactly what is needed for this problem. Without healthy religion and psychology, we will have no internal or inherent source for our own dignity and positive self-image, no “stable core.” Instead, we are driven to find our status and our dignity externally—by what we wear, our job title, by how much money we have, what car we drive, or even by how much “good” we do. That’s a pretty fragile way to live. We are constantly evaluating, “How am I doing? How am I looking?”
A transformed believer knows that their stable core dignity is something that God gratuitously gives from the moment of conception. Each of us is inherently, objectively, totally, and forever a child of God. We cannot gain or lose that by any achievement or failure whatsoever. God doesn’t participate in the honor-and-shame system.
In most honor-and-shame systems, which are almost always grounded in culturally male values, a “true man” always seeks the best, the top, and the most in terms of roles, power, status, and possessions. Jesus tried to free us from all these traps. Throughout the Gospels, we find numerous teachings promoting downward mobility. The most familiar of these may be, “The last shall be first, and the first shall be last” (Matthew 20:16), and Jesus’s consistent honoring of the least, the outsider, the sinner, and the physically or mentally challenged.
Some form of the honor-and-shame system is seen in almost all of history. In such a system, there is immense social pressure to follow “the rules.” If a person doesn’t follow the rules, they are not honorable and no longer deserve respect. And anyone who shows such a “shameful” person respect is also considered dishonorable.
Jesus frequently and publicly showed respect to “sinners” (see John 8:10–11) and even ate with them (see Luke 19:2–10; Mark 2:16–17). In doing so, he was openly dismissing the ego-made honor-and-shame system of his time—and ours.
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The Freedom of Hiddenness
by Henri Nouwen
Adapted excerpt (from Nouwen’s writings on hiddenness and humility):
“Our greatest temptation is to do good in order to be seen.
But Jesus calls us to a different way—the way of hiddenness.In a world that rewards visibility, recognition, and success,
we are invited to live from a place where we do not need to prove anything.When we can act without needing affirmation,
we begin to trust that we are already loved.The question is not ‘How am I perceived?’
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but ‘Am I resting in the love of God?’”
Jesus Calling: March 19
I speak to you from the depths of your being. Hear Me saying soothing words of Peace, assuring you of My Love. Do not listen to voices of accusation, for they are not from Me. I speak to you in love-tones, lifting you up. My Spirit convicts cleanly, without crushing words of shame. Let the Spirit take charge of your mind, combing out tangles of deception. Be transformed by the trust that I live within you.
The Light of My Presence is shining upon you, in benedictions of Peace. Let My Light shine in you; don’t dim it with worries or fears. Holiness is letting Me live through you. Since I dwell in you, you are fully equipped to be holy. Pause before responding to people or situations, giving My Spirit space to act through you. Hasty words and actions leave no room for Me; this is atheistic living. I want to inhabit all your moments–gracing your thoughts, words, and behavior.
RELATED SCRIPTURE:
Romans 8:1-2 (NLT)
Life in the Spirit
8 So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. 2 And because you belong to him, the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you from the power of sin that leads to death.
Colossians 1:27 (NLT)
27 For God wanted them to know that the riches and glory of Christ are for you Gentiles, too. And this is the secret: Christ lives in you. This gives you assurance of sharing his glory.
1st Corinthians 6:19 (NLT)
19 Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself,
